


The Tides of Lee Donghyuck

by donghyuque



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Anxiety, Depression, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Multi, Polyamory, Suicidal Thoughts, They love each other so much, a few tears (many tears), can you tell im lonely lol, focuses on jaemin a lot too, i tried to include everyone equally, lots of figurative language but not like. cryptic or anything, no significant plot just pretty much what donghyuck's going through and comfort, overuse of petnames
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-27
Updated: 2019-01-28
Packaged: 2019-10-17 22:28:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,598
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17569106
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/donghyuque/pseuds/donghyuque
Summary: When he feels himself slipping for the first time in months, he keeps it to himself.It's a good thing that he has three stubborn boyfriends to love him through anything.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> sup fam it's been a hot minute. I've had this in my docs since november, didn't actually think i was gonna post it but Here We Are. Sorry if you're one of the people who gave me a request, ive been Goin Through It and no for real i have a lot on my plate rn so i don't actually have much set time to write and ive had no inspo. there's this though. The next part will be posted tomorrow or in the next couple of days. 
> 
> !!!!!This is in no way trying to glorify or romanticize depression or mental illness. This is based off very real feelings. I'm sorry if it potentially came out glorified. It's purely a platform to lay out feelings. It's not meant to be harmful. 
> 
> anyways hope it's ok sorry for dying

Throughout most of his life, Donghyuck’s always gone to his friends when his depression begins to consume him. Their love and support has gotten him through his lowest moments, and thus he’s never felt too terrible about confiding in and relying on them to a degree. 

 

It’s not until university he truly tries to deal with these episodes himself. 

 

He, Jaemin, Jeno, and Renjun were all accepted into different schools after graduation. They’re lucky enough to be within half-an-hour of each other, but it’s a noticeably stark contrast compared to seeing each other nearly every day. 

 

That being said, Donghyuck sees how his boyfriends are swamped with homework and their own jobs, and he understands. He’s in the same position; trying to afford daily necessities while keeping his grades up is a hell of a lot of work. 

 

So, when he feels himself slipping for the first time in months, he keeps it to himself. 

 

It’s not as difficult as it would have been in high school; his boyfriends can pick up on his decreased mood and inner conflicts easily when spending so much time with him, but Donghyuck knows he can properly hide it in small doses.

 

The four of them still talk pretty much daily, having vowed not to grow apart with the newfound distance, but excuses are easy to make when Donghyuck isn’t being monitored by concerned eyes. His boyfriends are stressed, and hell, he is too, but they’re still happy. Donghyuck admires how they deal with stress; when he’s particularly stressed, he shuts down.

 

The group meets up as often as possible, granted their lives are fairly busy at the moment. Despite this, they still make time for each other. Donghyuck’s university is only a fifteen minute drive from Renjun’s, twenty minutes from Jaemin’s, and just under thirty from Jeno’s, so they try to see each other once a week at the absolute bare minimum. Given their schedules, it’s a feat worth applauding. 

 

This busy schedule also means it goes straight over everyone’s heads when Donghyuck begins to isolate himself. 

 

There’s a coldness that washes over him. A pit of dread is ever present in his stomach, like a tide coming in, somehow always pushing and pulling, making his body wrought with nausea. He wonders what he did to deserve a sadness so large that it makes him feel physically ill. 

 

He finds at some point, his misery grows so drastically that his body can’t hold it anymore, and all of the unwelcomed emotions pour into a hollow vat of nothingness.

 

That’s when the emptiness sets in.

 

Donghyuck doesn’t know if the apathy is worse or not. When it entraps his brain in it’s selfish tendrils, he finds he doesn’t feel relieved that the loathing and pain is over.

 

Rather, he wonders if there’s any point in living if he can’t feel anything at all. 

 

But even then, he can’t place a finger on if he’s truly slipped into a state of indifference. He feels so little but somehow he also feels everything at once and he just wants it to  _ stop _ . It’s confusing and dizzying and endless and he can’t figure out how to sort his brain out for the life of him. 

 

It’s an odd place to be in, and Donghyuck doesn’t think he can escape it this time. 

 

It’s possibly the most bewildering thing Donghyuck’s ever experienced, and he’s saying that as someone who’s stared advanced calculus in the eyes. 

 

A week in, he thinks he’s never felt worse. Usually within days he’s informed his boyfriend’s of the situation, or they’ve caught on themselves. It’s not something they can magically make go away, but having them by his side supporting and loving him always helps. 

 

This time, though, he’s seen their stress and concerns without Donghyuck adding onto that burden. Surely, this is something he can deal with on his lonesome. 

 

He doesn’t know how he’s let it get so bad in only a week (he knows it’s not something he can control, but it doesn’t make him feel any less guilty or pitiful, for lack of better word), but he does know that he’s called in to work, supposedly horridly ill, for the past three days, and has missed two of his classes. The stress does nothing for his current situation, only worsening it. The school he’s missed makes him feel like a complete failure and he wants to cry, more so than usual (rather impressive, if he must say so himself) at the prospect of catching up and facing his professors after the absences. 

 

He’s barely moved from bed at all in the past few days. All he wants to do is sleep. He wants to sleep for hours and hours and dream of nothing but bliss and being a  _ sliver _ of okay. 

 

He can’t sleep though. Not well, at least. He stays up into the late hours of the night, mind full of thoughts that he can’t silence for the life of him. 

 

Donghyuck tries to remember what it felt like when he was truly happy, he really does. It doesn’t work though, because what people don’t seem to understand is that when he slips into this state of mind, very little matters anymore. He feels absolutely hopeless, and anything other than unadulterated misery feels out of reach and unrealistic. 

 

That happiness he felt two weeks prior feels worthless and long gone. He can’t remember what it felt like, nor can he imagine how to get it back. At this point, he finds he doesn’t want to stick around to try and find it again. He berates himself for such a selfish thought and burrows himself further into his blankets, determined to suffocate the feelings.

 

It’s around this time, a week in, when his boyfriends start getting concerned. Donghyuck knows his front has slowly been crumbling: the texts he’s been sending to their group chat dwindling down into barely anything, and his suspicious cancellation of their plans when they  _ know _ Donghyuck is always the most eager to see everyone, are dead giveaways. Yet, he still wholeheartedly denies and dismisses any worries his three lovers send him with an emoticon heart and complaint about a so-called ‘big test’ he has to prepare for. It’s enough to keep them off his back.

 

Donghyuck can easily predict that his boyfriends will be sad, and maybe even angry, if they ever find out that he’s been hiding this from them. They all have each other’s best interest in mind--Donghyuck knows this--but he still doesn’t want to inconvenience them with his own petty problems. 

 

His new roommate and friend, Eric, is quick to notice something’s up too, though this is a given when you’re living with someone who hasn’t moved from his bed in days. He tries to help Donghyuck, even just get him to open up a little, but the other boy doesn’t let him get far. 

 

Any and all efforts start to feel worthless for everyone involved.

 

-

 

“You look like a fluff-ball,” Eric comments jokingly at his roommate, who’s still buried in his bed a hefty two weeks into his episode. He’s moved from his nest for work a few times during the week due to an unexpected spike of anxiety that screams  _ get off your ass, you’re ruining your own life _ , only for him to return later and ask himself if even cares if he ruins his life at this point, but that’s about it. 

 

“Thanks, I guess,” Donghyuck drones in response, barely sparing a half-lidded glance in Eric’s direction. His phone pings loudly from beside him. Both boys stare at it for a moment before Donghyuck chooses to ignore it. Worry swells in Eric’s chest, a frown appearing on his lips. He may have only known Donghyuck for a few months, but he knows the boy always jumps at the opportunity to talk to anyone. 

 

He makes his way to his own side of the room, dumping his belongings beside his bed before flopping onto it himself. He opens instagram, then navigates to Donghyuck’s account and finds a photo of him with his boyfriends tagged. He’s a tad reluctant to shoot any of the boys a message, but he reasons that it’s for Donghyuck’s sake, and he can’t just sit around and watch his friend suffering. He presses one of the accounts, Jaemin’s, specifically.

 

**_sohn_eric_ **

_ Hi, you’re one of Donghyuck’s boyfriends, right? I’m his roommate. _

 

He sends it, not expecting an answer right away considering it’s the middle of the day, Jaemin is surely busy. Much to Eric’s surprise, his phone vibrates with a response only a minute later.

 

**_najaeminn_ **

_ Hey, yes I am. Is he okay? _

 

He finds he’s not really sure how to respond, because he doesn’t know how serious the situation really is. 

 

**_sohn_eric_ **

_ i’m not really sure tbh. he doesn’t seem okay. he’s barely left his bed in like. two weeks? _

 

**_najaeminn_ **

_ fuck _

 

**_najaeminn_ **

_ He usually tells us when things get bad again _

 

**_najaeminn_ **

_ Is it okay if we come over?? _

 

**_sohn_eric_ **

_ no go ahead. yall can have the dorm _

 

**_najaeminn_ **

_ Thank you so much. Seriously. I’ll be there probs within the hour _

 

**_sohn_eric_ **

_ no need to thank me :1) see ya around _

 

He shoots a quick text to his friends, informing them he’ll be crashing at their dorm that night before pocketing his phone. He can feel Donghyuck’s curious eyes on his back as he packs an overnight bag and gathers his necessities. 

 

“What are you doing?” Donghyuck asks after a moment of observing. 

 

“I’m staying at a friend’s place for the night, that okay?” He says while shoving a questionably clean shirt into his bag. Donghyuck makes an affirmative noise before tucking himself back into the corner of his bed and closing his eyes.

 

Eric slips out of their dorm, hoping that whatever is going on with his dear roommate gets solved.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and that's that on that
> 
> hope this was alright, thanks for reading!
> 
> sorry if there's any spelling errors

To say Jaemin’s been worried would be an understatement. They’ve all been, really. It’s always a tad concerning when their usually so socially-inclined boyfriend starts to shut himself off, but they trust him to come to them when he needs help.

 

Jaemin can’t help but think he should have been keeping a better eye out.

 

When he receives the message from Eric, his heart leaps into his throat. He’s grateful the boy chose to message him, rather than Renjun or Jeno, as both of the boys are in classes, but he’s jittery as he answers, hoping for some real insight into Donghyuck’s situation.

 

Their short exchange confirms Jaemin’s anxieties, and he decides, work-be-damned, he needs to see his boyfriend. He packs blankets, pillows, and snacks into his car, then proceeds to send a message to Jeno and Renjun, explaining the situation for when they get out of their respective classes.

 

The ride to the dorm isn’t long, and Jaemin silently curses the fact that he hasn’t been making the short journey more often. 

 

He, admittedly, looks kind of stupid walking up to the dorm building, fully decked in a big bag of snacks, pillows clutched in his arms, and blankets hanging off of him. He figures it’s university and there’s no way a bunch of overly-stressed, caffeine-fuelled young adults are going to judge him too heavily.

 

He drops everything he brought on the floor of the hallway (and ignores the icy glare a passing student sends him as she steps over the pile he created) and knocks on the door. There’s a creak of the bed and a light shuffling sound that follows. The door slowly opens and reveals a duvet-clad Donghyuck, looking tired and adorably confused. 

 

“Nana?” He asks quietly, not quite sure what his younger boyfriend is doing at his dorm, when the student should be working, no less.

 

“Hey, baby,” Jaemin grins, “I brought things?” He says sheepishly, gesturing to the small mountain on the floor. He tries not to focus on the heavy bags that line Donghyuck’s eyes, or the usually fluffy hair that’s flat to his head. Donghyuck hesitates for a moment before stepping aside to give Jaemin space to enter.

 

“What are you doing here?” He asks, pulling the blanket tighter around him. Jaemin smiles fondly at the cute boy in front of him and briefly wonders how he got so lucky.

 

“What can I say, I’ve just missed you,” Jaemin says as he gathers his items from the hallway floor. He shuts the door, places the armful on Eric’s bed, and goes to kiss his boyfriend. Donghyuck lightly pushes him away with a scrunch of his nose.

 

“Don’t. I’m gross right now,” he mumbles. It’s understandable, but it still just doesn’t feel right when his most affectionate boyfriend denies any form of contact.

 

“But I wanna love you,” Jaemin whines, dragging out the you. His blatant childishness doesn’t even rouse a small smile on Donghyuck’s face, and he can feel his chest squeeze in sadness. It’s been months since one of these episodes, and he just wants to cuddle the shorter boy and keep him safe from anything that could ever hurt him. Jaemin opts to nudge the blankets off of Donghyuck’s shoulders and take the other’s hands into his own, eyebrows furrowed in concern. 

 

“Hey, that’s okay, why don’t you go and get cleaned up, it might make you feel a bit better. How does that sound?” Jaemin offers, lightly swinging their arms. Donghyuck nods stiffly, pulling out of the loose grip to collect his showering products, and then heads out to the communal bathrooms. 

 

Jaemin’s frown deepens. Not only is the loud boy barely talking, but he’s not complaining about the communal bathrooms--a facility that he passionately hates. If Jaemin didn’t know something was wrong before, he’s certain now. 

 

By the time Donghyuck returns, Jaemin has already pulled the mattresses off of the beds and created a ‘mega-bed’ (as he had labelled it) with all the blankets and pillows he has access to. 

 

Donghyuck enters the room, towel and shower-basket in hand. His brown hair is starting to dry, yet still fluffy and Jaemin just wants to cuddle with the soft looking boy for the rest of his life. He makes grabby hands, purposely acting pathetic in hopes to put the inkling of a smile on Donghyuck’s face.    

 

Instead of any smile, Donghyuck all but throws himself into Jaemin’s waiting arms. He pulls one of the blankets over them and wraps his arms around the taller boy’s ribs, face pressed into his collarbones and neck. Jaemin’s caught off guard for only a second before he wraps his arms around Donghyuck and pulls him closer. He lightly draws his fingers up and down Donghyuck’s nape, letting the boy bask in the physical affection. 

 

“We’re gonna have to talk about the past few weeks, you know that right?” Jaemin asks softly. Donghyuck’s shoulders seize and his hold slackens. He pulls back slightly to look at the younger’s face. 

 

“There’s nothing to talk about, Nana,” he shows his first smile of the night, but there’s something off about it. Jaemin reaches up and brushes through Donghyuck’s hair with his fingers, gently detangling it. Donghyuck unknowingly leans into the touch. 

 

“You’re supposed to tell us when things are getting bad again, sweetheart,” Jaemin says, nothing but love held in his voice. 

 

“I’ve been busy, it’s,” he pauses, taking a deep breath, “ _ it’s _ not bad again.” There’s traces of venom and resentment in his voice when he mentions the cursed ‘it’, refusing to acknowledge that there’s any type of problem. 

 

“Baby, it’s okay,” Jaemin says, consideration painting his words. The pure kindness and genuine care that Jaemin holds are enough to evoke every emotion Donghyuck has been suppressing, and before he knows it, there are tears falling down his face. 

 

Jaemin hurries to pull both of them into sitting positions, hugging the upset boy closely to his chest. He doesn’t shush, doesn’t tell him not to cry, just rubs the shaking boy’s back and makes sure he knows that, no matter what, he’ll be a pillar of love and support. 

 

“I’m so- so sorry,” Donghyuck hiccups after a few minutes, lifting a hand to roughly wipe at his eyes. He gets his crying under control, letting Jaemin coddle him. 

 

“You have nothing to be sorry for,” he replies, tenderly drying the few tears that remain falling down Donghyuck’s face. He cups the smaller boy’s cheeks, sadness and adoration pooling in his chest. His boyfriend looks so  _ tiny _ , face and eyes tinted pink from crying, occasional sniffles still wracking his frame. Jaemin wants to wrap him up and protect him from the world. 

 

He can’t resist, and leans in to press his own lips against his boyfriend’s pouted ones. Maybe not the best timing, but that doesn’t seem to matter to either of them. It’s not a long kiss, but it’s packed full of love and so many unspoken promises of ‘I’m here, I won’t leave.’

 

Jaemin pulls away and rests his forehead against Donghyuck’s. The latter’s doe eyes peer up into Jaemin’s own, and he can’t stop the smile that springs onto his face.

 

“I love you,” he murmurs truthfully, hoping he can convey how much he really does adore Donghyuck, but knowing that it’s impossible to express something so massive in just words. A smile graces Donghyuck’s lips as well. It’s small, but there. It’s like a small weight off of Donghyuck’s shoulders, feeling something other than negativity for the first time in weeks.

 

“I love you too,” he replies. He grabs Jaemin’s hands and plays with his fingers, giddiness from hearing those words after not seeing his boyfriend for weeks creeping up into his chest. They get resettled under the massive pile of blankets and pull a movie up on Donghyuck’s laptop. 

 

“You know,” Jaemin trails off after a few minutes of comfortable silence, “You’re gonna need to tell me why eventually. Probably when the others get here.” Donghyuck seems contemplative. The movement in his hands has stilled while he stares ahead in thought.

 

“The others?” He asks eventually, his voice small. 

 

“Yeah, they’re coming here after their classes,” he answers, casting a nervous glance at the other boy. He doesn’t want to overwhelm Donghyuck, but he knows, regardless, that telling Jeno and Renjun was the right thing to do.

 

“Okay,” Donghyuck says shortly, dismissing the conversation with the pressing of his body into Jaemin’s own. The taller boy takes Donghyuck into his arms fully, their attention diverted to the film playing in front of them.

 

-

 

Renjun and Jeno arrive together. They don’t knock when they enter the dorm room, just quietly open the door. 

 

“Oh, Hyuckie,” Renjun mutters sadly at the sight of his worse-for-wear looking lover. Jeno joins the pair in the makeshift bed before Renjun does. He slips off his shoes and crawls next Donghyuck, wordlessly pulling the boy from Jaemin’s grasp (ignoring the pout Jaemin sends him). Donghyuck allows himself to be passed from one boy to another, just pleased to be held. Jeno hugs his small boyfriend tightly, closing his eyes and taking in everything about the boy he’s missed for the past weeks. He pulls back only to lean forward and press a big kiss to Donghyuck’s forehead. Renjun smiles fondly at them as he places himself next to Jaemin.

 

“Hi, Nana,” Renjun says, affectionately squeezing the boy’s hand. Jaemin squeezes back, a habit of assurance they’d developed years before. 

 

“Injunnie,” Jaemin responds lovingly as they observe their boyfriends. They can hear small words of comfort and love being exchanged between the two boys, but their voices are hushed in a private moment of adoration for each other. 

 

In a moments notice, though, Donghyuck’s detached himself from Jeno and instead glued himself to Renjun. The oldest boy makes a small noise of surprise when his boyfriend has no restraint in squeezing his middle, the action saying ‘I’ve missed you’ in more ways than words ever could. 

 

“Hey, angel,” Renjun greets warmly, hand coming up to stroke the back of Donghyuck’s head. The addressed boy makes a muffled sound from where his face is pressed into Renjun’s shoulder. Renjun can feel him begin to shake, and he grows increasingly concerned at the small pitiful noises that he starts hearing.

 

“I’m sorry, I don’t know why I’m crying, I’m just,” He sniffles, contemplating his next words, “I’ve just been lonely.” All three of his boyfriends can feel their heart-strings tug. Donghyuck lets himself be pulled backwards to lean against Jeno’s chest, yet again. He pulls his legs up to his chest and tries to avoid Jaemin and Renjun’s troubled eyes. 

 

“You could have come to us, sweetheart,” Jeno mumbles softly from behind him. 

 

“I know,” Donghyuck says weakly, trying to stall his tears, “I didn’t wanna inconvenience any of you.” Renjun leans forward and grabs the upset boy’s hands, preventing him from roughly scrubbing at his face anymore. 

 

“It’s never an inconvenience, Hyuckie. We want what’s best for you, we told you to come to us if things got bad again,” Renjun says kindly, stroking a thumb over Donghyuck’s knuckles. 

 

“I didn’t wanna stress you out, you’ve got so much on your plate already,” he all but whimpers, attempting to tuck his chin into his chest to dodge the gazes of the other boys. Jaemin tuts and lifts the boy’s chin, forcing him to stare straight into the younger’s eyes.

 

“You’re never a stressor, sweetheart. You’re a million times more important than anything any of us have on our plate,” Jaemin insists, expression somber but full of truth. Jeno hums in agreement, arms tightening around Donghyuck’s waist. The upset boy gently removes one of his hands from Renjun’s and goes to rub at his tear stained cheeks. He pauses at the look Renjun gives him, wiping his tears in a much softer fashion than he would have before. Renjun grabs his hand again after he’s moved it away from his face. 

 

“I should know how to deal with this myself by now,” he hiccups. A distressed noise rings from behind him, and Jeno is quick to argue before either of the other boys can get a word in.

 

“There’s no reason for you to deal by yourself, though,” he speaks fast but clear, “We’re here for you, that’s our purpose.” 

 

“Your purpose isn’t to cater to my every need and make sure I’m fine all the time though,” Donghyuck says, turning himself in Jeno’s arms in a half-assed attempt to make eye contact. His words have no impact, as his voice is weak and he knows they’ll argue nonetheless. 

 

“Maybe that’s what you think, but I want to, and I’m sure both of these oafs want to, too,” Renjun says, absentmindedly insulting the other two in the room. Jeno only snorts in a short chuckle, whereas Jaemin squawks indignitaly and slaps Renjun’s arm. 

 

“Oh hush, it’s all from a place of love,” Renjun chastises Jaemin. A small smile appears on Donghyuck’s face through his slowly stopping tears. Renjun has to resist a cheer of triumph, instead opting for a large smile and small peck to Donghyuck’s nose.

 

“What Renjun said is true, though. We want to be here for you, you’d do the same,” Jaemin says, confidence in his words evident in his voice. Donghyuck huffs lightly before hesitantly nodding in agreement.

 

“I just don’t think it’s right for me to put all my problems on you,” he weakly argues. He can feel Jeno lightly shake his head from behind him, the older boy’s nose lightly dragging along Donghyuck’s hair. 

 

“Stupid boy,” Jeno says quietly, ignoring the slap Donghyuck lands on his thigh. 

 

“We wanna hear your problems and help you with them, though,” Jaemin pouts, silently praying he can somehow get through to Donghyuck. He reaches up and gently wipes the now-stopped tears from the boy’s face. He doesn’t know how he can possibly express how much he loves this boy; none of them can, really. 

 

They sit in complete silence for a moment, anticipation eating at the atmosphere of the room.

 

“I don’t know when I’m gonna be able to believe that,” Donghyuck says, and the three boy’s hearts momentarily sink, “But for now I just wanna be cuddled, please and thanks.” There’s a figurative collective breath let out by Jeno, Jaemin, and Renjun, because maybe Donghyuck’s going through a lot at the moment, but at least he’s still their Donghyuck. 

 

Jeno doesn’t bother letting go of Donghyuck, just flops backwards with the boy clasped in his arms. Donghyuck makes a panicked yelp at the force of unexpectedly being pulled back, but is content to be cradled in the older boy’s arms. 

 

Renjun huffs in adoration with a small upturn of his lips. “At least get under the covers, you dorks.” Jeno whines, but Donghyuck knows he’s smiling nonetheless. The blankets are roughly pulled out from under the two boys (it’s quite the struggle, but Jaemin and Renjun manage). There’s no time for either of the cuddling boys to complain before the other two plop themselves on either sides of the pair, and the duvet it draped across all of them.

 

It’s a welcome warmth, not only the physical sensation of having three people essentially piling on him, but the feeling he gets in the pit of his stomach; a miniscule matchstick that curls a shard of the coldness away. Yet, despite its size, it’s comforting; he knows that the smallest flame can turn into the biggest fire. 

 

He’s abruptly pulled out of his thoughts when Jaemin rolls on top of him completely, draping his body across his three boyfriends. His face lays directly on Renjun’s lap, and Donghyuck can only watch fondly as the oldest jokingly pushes Jaemin’s grinning face away, effectively taking the rest of the boy’s body with it. 

 

“Why the hell do I love you,” Renjun mutters lowly, rubbing his hands over his face is a faux-stressed expression. Jaemin laughs, his chest hiccuping in amusement. Donghyuck can’t help but crack a smile, the swelling of love in his chest only growing when Jeno begins rubbing his thumb over Donghyuck’s wrist. He pushes himself back into the dance major’s chest, allowing himself a moment to bask in the pure love he’s feeling. He watches the other two squabble back and forth, the warmth spreading. 

 

Despite this all, his mind still tries to push thoughts of being abandoned by the people he loves. Thoughts of them realizing he’s too much to handle, and not worth the effort.

 

He tries to push back the fearful thoughts of his boyfriend’s leaving and taking that momentary  _ okay _ with them, but he attempts to remind himself that, no, they’re his boyfriends and they know now. They won’t let him go through this alone.

 

“You two bicker like an old married couple,” Jeno jokingly remarks at the pair. Donghyuck’s heart swells. He can only hope for that one day.

 

He finds his painful thoughts drowned out, even just a little bit, by the people he loves (totally not because they’re louder than a freight train. No, not at all). It’s a welcome change from the tidal wave of negativity he’s usually accompanied by. He sighs contentedly and closes his eyes, happy to just listen to the chatter around him. He doesn’t notice himself dozing off, and sleeps soundly for the first time in weeks.

 

-

  
The next morning, Eric walks into his and Donghyuck’s shared dorm, takes one look at the boys splayed on the floor, and turns one hundred and eighty degrees straight out the door.    
  
He can’t suppress the smile that springs to his face at the sight. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks again for reading! 
> 
> i don’t really ship people but i’m lonely so uhhh that’s where this came from

**Author's Note:**

> next part will be posted shortly. It's a lot longer and contains all the hurt/comfort!


End file.
